You know you're a parent when....
Baby wipes become a cleaning staple around the house
You are constantly tripping on toys that are everywhere in your house
You find you are still watching cartoons after your child has gone to bed and you haven't realized for 10 minutes
You have been puked on, pooped on, peed on and you still love them
You hear mommy or daddy 5 million times a day!!
You only thing you can't wait for is the kids bedtime
You have copious amounts of laundry
Running out of diapers constitutes as an emergency
You go through more milk than a dairy farm
you clean your house day after day and it always looks the same
You cannot go to the bathroom alone
You can no longer have a civilized phone conversation
Your toilet has been plugged with massive amounts of toilet paper
You have mysterious stains on your clothing be it food or milk of juice maybe even spit (yay)
There are fingers in your ears eyes and nose and they are not your own
You have one of the following in your purse, candy, soother, diaper, McDonald's toy and even if you're lucky a dirty diaper
You wake up with a little foot on your face and little hands draped on your spouse, sideways
You have been climbed on, stepped on and jumped on
You find yourself saying things like "don't wipe your cracker on the floor, don't colour on the dog"
You can do almost anything with one hand
You have had someone excitedly call you to come look at their poop
When losing a stuffed animal is the end of the world itself
When silence means something bad is happening
Going to work is a break
You have actually tried to pick someone else's nose
And despite all this you know you're a parent when all these things happen and your heart is still full of love and you come back for more each and every day.
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